Pranking Butler
by silviaastrid11
Summary: a collection of one and two shots in which assorted characters prank Butler set after The Last Guardian[mostly] PLEASE READ!
1. Chapter 1

Fowl manor a few weeks after LG

Butler was walking down the hallway when his mobile phone rang. It immediately went to the ring tone of Brick House. He quickly turned down the volume. If Juliet heard it would never hear the end of it. When he glanced at the caller ID It popped up as Artemis. why? If Artemis needed him he could just stick his head out of his study and call Butler with his own voice there was no need for electronics in this situation but, Artemis had called so very reluctantly butler hit the answer button.

"LOLIPOPS" shouted who ever was at the end of the line certainly not Artemis he detested lollipops. Butler opened the door to Artemis's bedroom he out of the corner of his eye saw someone duck under the bed. Butler crossed the room, fully expecting Myles and Becket to be crouching behind the furniture but, no on the other side of the bed was Holly and Mulch giggleing around a modified Iphone 6 that belonged to a certain Artemis Fowl.

"You pranked me?" asked Butler


	2. a sign

Pranking Butler

Chapter #2

Signs

An. Hi everyone this is my first ever fanfic please leave a review and tell me what you do or don't like. it is again set after LG

Beckett Fowl was running down the hallway trying to decide to how to perfectly execute his plan. Normally his genius brother Myles was the one doing all the plotting and planning but this time it was Beckett's turn. Turning into the non formal living room Beckett saw Butler his nose buried deep into a Guns and Ammo magazine. Slyly he walked over to where Butler sat and with out warning jumped onto him. With lightning reflexes butler stood up and flung Beckett across the room but before leaving contact with Butler Beckett stuck a paper sign on Butlers back.

"please do not startle me Beckett," thundered Butler, "but I needed to get up any way, so I guess I should thank you." concluded Butler and left the room and headed to the dojo.

An, review please and try to guess what the sign says


	3. Kick me

AN: this chapter is dedicated to greenpineapple for being the first to review

I am promise the next chapter will be longer, please continue to be your amazing self! Now to the story

When butler arrived at the dojo he was not surprised to see his ex wrestler sister, Juliet whacking the punching bag like it had personally insulted her grandmother. After calling his sister over, he and Juliet began working on there hand to hand combat. Suddenly, Juliet got a scary grin on her face like she new something Butler didn't and weirdly begun spinning in circles then preformed a round house kick that would have made Chuck Norris proud landing it firmly in the thoracic region of Butlers back. Butler who was thoroughly surprised about being kicked in the back grabbed Juliet by the arm and firmly sat her on the ground.

"What was that for?" thundered Butler

"Well if you don't want kicked don't go around asking for it" scolded Juliet though on the inside she was laughing at the expression on his face as the light bulb went of in his head.

"Becket you, you" fumed Butler

"Pranker" supplied Juliet

AN: please review people I will update twice today because I will not be able to update tomorrow BY!


	4. toothpaste

AN: I made this chapter longer just for you green pineapple. Hope all yall enjoy it!

This one is set before AF

Butler was busy restraining five year old Juliet Butler in the bath room, after coming home from kindergarten that day she had randomly decided that she was no longer going to brush her teeth so now butler was going to have to force her.

"I DON'T WANT TO," yelled little Juliet

"You have to Juliet," scolded Butler firmly, "it is a part of daily hygiene"

"But," said Juliet lower lip quivering

"No buts," replied her brother. Juliet did not reply, she couldn't, there was a toothbrush in her mouth.

After the tooth brush dilemma 5 year old Juliet decided she needed some revenge and walked into her brother's private bathroom.

Line break

Early the next morning [5:00 am to be exact] Butler was walking into the bathroom to take a shower and grabbed the brushed nickel door handle. Immediately, butlers hand was covered by toothpaste.

"I was pranked by a kindergartener," said Butler

AN: PLEASE REVIEW!

I made this longer for you greenpineapple

Please give me prank ideas!


	5. CHOCOLATE 1

AN: hope you enjoy and please review now on with the story this is set at the time between AC and LG when mulch was living in the tunnel under the Fowl Estate

It was Butlers birthday he had the day off and was going to spend that time watching wrestling videos with Juliet, eating sorbet [the joys of being lactose intolerant] and not having to deal with crazy demented pixies for a whole day. When mountain man made it down the stairs he was surprised to find a box with his name on it [An: not his real name it read Butler ok] upon opening the parcel he saw two lindor truffles

"Well someone remembered." he muttered popping one of the chocolates in his mouth. Immediately he realized it was not chocolate in there it was brown clay then he looked at the note that was enclosed in the box

To: Butler

From: Tombstone/Diggance/Mulch

Revenge hehehe

Quickly butler threw away the remaining "chocolates" knowing Mulch they could have contained something a lot, lot worse than clay. Then it dawned on the bodyguard

"He pranked me."

AN: review! I will not update till I get ten just saying its only 4 more reviews please!


	6. AN it will kill us all!

AN: I am now going to update twice a week once on Monday and once on Friday or Saturday I will also try to make updates longer thank you to all those who reviewed!


End file.
